At the end of every year, like many of us, I would list all the things I wanted to accomplish in the new year. Sometimes the list was in my head and it was fleeting. When the list made it to paper, the goals involved goals like wanting to travel more, take more baths, and lose 10 lbs.
This year I want all those things, but mostly, I want to feel more peace, and moreso, give the gift of more peace to all moms. The tips I’m sharing with you here are based on what I’ve had to learn myself, and what I’ve applied to my coaching practice, typically working with moms in the work force. I personally plan to implement these self-care strategies, as I’m certain they will serve in starting and continuing the year the way I really want – in control of my choices and with a sense of grace.
Beyond Moms, apply these tips to your daily routine! I assure you that you will feel more grounded and peaceful:
Wake up with YOU time built in
Give yourself time for you – to wake up, to center, to visualize your day. Meditate for 10 minutes or at the very least, breathe. Five deep breaths can be enough.
Often, I’m woken up by an elbow in the face or a little body stretched across my bladder. Not ideal, butI know I’m not the only one!
Regardless of whether I’ve got extra time or if I am running late, I can fit in some meditating somewhere within the 10-20 min mark or at the very least those precious five deep breaths.
When other variables start showing up during the morning I can reach for my list of affirmations. It reminds me that I can control my response to any situation, especially when the circumstances are beyond my control. My response can change the outcome and therefore help to guide the situation I am in.
“I’m going slow because I’m in a hurry”
This is not my quote, it’s actually my moms, and I’ve only ever heard it in Greek. It’s truth does not get lost in translation.
Giving myself time to breathe. Giving the kids time to transition between activities (even though they know what they need to do every morning). Stopping when it’s starting to blow up and dealing with the tantrum or hurt feeling (or… insert a million other possibilities), instead of trying to just rush it along, always pays off in the end. It pays off because if I slow down enough to connect with them, I keep my sanity. I don’t need to yell! I actually save time because it never goes smoothly if I just try to push them out the door without tuning in to the rhythm of their emotional needs (and mine).
Meditation is definitely a ritual, but these mini ones are the more practical ones. I keep it simple where I can. Everyone start with water! Morning grumpiness can be because of dehydration. Breakfast: I have 2 or 3 breakfast options for me and the kids that provide enough variety yet are easy to execute.
Same with my outfits. I Know what works yet I keep it fresh. For me that means a lot of black but it also means honoring my body and what flatters me and makes me feel good. Release the attempts to fit into an item or a style that is not for you.
Turn off the news, and don’t check social media
News is noise. It’s all bad and it’s a negative way to start your day, especially after taking you time to center and elevate your good vibes. You will not miss out on what is going on in the world. Check the weather on your phone, that’s all you need to get out the door in one piece.
The news also creates a state of anxiety in our children who are growing up in a world that is always on.
Put on music instead, it makes breakfast more fun!
And definitely do not check social media! It’s the easiest way to kill progress and eat time.
Invite only love into your head
Just as keeping out news in the morning keeps the vibe positive, protect who you allow in your head as you commute or while you are at work. Would you invite that negative co-worker to your dinner table? Or that awful cab driver? If not, then delete them from your daily thoughts as quickly as possible. Do not give them any more of your precious time. This is not selfish, it is a form of self-love. Protecting our good high energy allows us to stay happier and healthier and extend that to our kids, as well as our work output.
No keeping up with the Joneses
The Joneses for our purposes are other moms. No more comparing.
‘They are more organized!’
‘Those kids always get the best grades’
‘How can her hair always be done’
‘I wish I had those boots, or those thighs’
Those other moms are you. We are all doing our own dance with the steps that we know.
Connect instead. Grab a tea with the Joneses mom and get a glimpse into her very human day. Invite her into your village.
No complaining about the good stuff
Complaining is not conversation.
We all know someone who complains about their partner, or their kids, or all the things they need to do before a big party or event on the weekend.
Our lives are filled with people and events and stories. Remember to be grateful that we have these active, engaged parts of our lives.
We tend to be people pleasers and fill our schedules with things events and comittments that don’t bring us joy. We say yes and take on too much and our hearts are not always in. By all contribute, help, give and let your instincts guide when you say yes. Do not say yes out of guilt or social pressure and then complain about it. Ask if you need help. Brainstorm ideas around how to keep it all running smoothly so you can keep your energy up and also serve with grace.
Plan some fun
What would be fun to schedule into your week? It doesn’t have to take much time or cost a lot of money, if at all. Look at your schedule and plan something! Reach out to a mom who also would love to have some fun. Get together for a walk or your nails, squeeze in a lunch or a gallery show after work. The point is to have something fun that you can look forward to!
Stay nourished, stay healthy.
I try to fuel my body for the marathon. Feed myself on a cellular level by planning my foods and taking my vitamins. Vitamins that are pharmaceutical grade (and I only trust 2 or 3 brands).
When we nourish our bodies in a clean, pure way we flow through the day in a smoother way. We don’t have time to feel sluggish or get sick!
Try smaller meals for dinner. With the right foods there is less digestion required while you’re sleeping and that can help you have a more restful sleep.
In the morning you’ll be ready for a nice big breakfast to start fueling your day.
I resolve to practice these morning strategies everyday.
Some days are easier than others to implement. Some days we may only remember one or two. Pull in what you need and go with it so it becomes a natural fit for you and your familyOver time, you will begin to recognize that you’re in your unique Mom Flow.
Written by Joanne Tsianos
Joanne has many roles – a QueenBee keeping it all buzzing – a mother, certified health coach, wellness expert, author, designer, PTA board member, Lego-builder extraordinaire. Joanne creates experiences for moms through the QueenBee Club that support working mothers to live radiantly by replacing the idea of balance with flow.
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