Exsqueeze Me, Preschool and IKEA
I received (via my daughter’s backpack) the newsletter for the girls’ preschools. Other than a couple of typos and my daughter’s name being spelled wrong as they listed her November birthday (which is actually in January, but who’s being picky?) I reflected on what my girls have learned since being in school.
- There is a very good chance my 3 year old’s decision to be called Abigail instead of Abby has nothing to do with her being independent and awesome – and far more to do with the fact that the teacher decided she needed to learn how to write her whole name. God forbid we give the little girl a win with a shorter nickname.
- My 4-year-old is coming home with REALLY similar worksheet pages as my 3-year-old. As in…I’m looking forward to parent-teacher conferences because I am kind of thinking she hasn’t learned jack since she’s been in school.
- The newsletter stresses that at home parents should work on skills with the kids. Seems like a good idea, right? But the skills we’re supposed to work on are things like identifying and putting on your own coat. Don’t most kids know how to do that BEFORE they’re potty trained?
The bottom line is my kids have fun there and it’s cheaper than a daycare. I get a break for three days a week, three hours each day. But I didn’t pick the learning tree preschool for teachers to tell my children what they should be called and for my pre-kindergartner to keep coming home after she’s learned about the colors. She knows her colors.
I considered putting her into a snotty smarty-kid preschool but then was reminded of the IKEA parent I saw yesterday. He was walking with his 4/5/6 year old boy (one boy, could be any of the three ages) and kept saying, “What’s the opposite? What’s the opposite?” I was by them for like five solid minutes and the dude sounded like a parrot reciting his one line.
I had no idea what the kid was supposed to answer. The opposite of WHAT, you ass? If he told the little kid five minutes ago and kept reciting that question there is no way that poor kid remembered anything other than the mantra being recited over and over and over again. He didn’t answer. I wouldn’t have either. I would like to make it clear I didn’t think the dad was really an ass until we saw him later downstairs and he was teaching his kid to say exSQUEEZE me when he walked by people. I at least understand trying to teach his kid the concept of opposites. Teaching him to have a lame, pathetic sense of humor? Unforgivable. I kind of think child services should be involved at that point – teaching your child to be an outcast with an outdated sense of humor should be considered neglectful and dangerous.
All the kids I’ve seen in gifted programs get there because they know oodles of facts. My girls don’t have facts coming out of their pores because I don’t drill them. They know concepts that blow my mind. They understand addition and subtraction, they understand fractions, they get that parts make a whole. They know that daytime will always come after nighttime. I’m at a loss for the really mind-blowing ones because they happen, I’m amazed, and then we go on with our day.
Maybe it’s best she’s in a play-based preschool. I’d hate for her to know too much going into public Kindergarten. Then she’ll be bored, act out, and suddenly there will be whispers of ADD and Ritalin. (That’s my fear anyway, and goodness knows if I have a fear the public school system will do it’s best to oblige! LOL)
I just don’t want to homeschool. It’s my mantra, like the man saying exsqueeze me in the housewares section of IKEA over and over again thinking it will be funny if he can just get his kid to say it.
I won’t have to homeschool.
I won’t have to homeschool.
I won’t have to homeschool.
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Yep – I’m a Joiner!
Wow. I’ve seen many horrific things at IKEA (and believe me, I rarely go there) but the exSQUEEZE me dad? That’s just so wrong.
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